Happy noir year
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It was 11:02. At night.
No time for decent folk to be exchanging SMSes.
And there it was.
The SMS I feared.
“HAPPY NEW YEAR”
I was afraid of the message.
But I was more annoyed than scared. It was the timing and the delivery.
I should’ve been quicker.
I should’ve sent the message out, not received it.
It was Harish.
“… since the networks are going to be jammed… HAPPY NEW YEAR…”
Damn.
Too slow.
I spun, reeling from the double blow.
The content and the timing.
The core of the message itself was lost on me.
There was nothing left for it, but, with unmitigated savagery, to destroy… something…
But the night, is no time for decent folk to be unleashing themselves upon a hapless game room. Not time enough for a slaughter, not even in Opposing Worlds.
It’s more than 12 hours too late now. But in the blazing sun… well, in the balmy sun… It has to be said.
I know it’s 12 hours too early for you.
But my magnum is loaded. Heavy.
It doesn’t like, being heavy.
So here it is.
I’m gonna unload it. One by one.
In your head. Not enough lead.
Damn puns. Never good enough.
Anyway, bozo.
You asked for it.
…
><
Happy noir year.
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January 1st, 2007 at 12:39 pm
noir = black ????
nouvelle annee !!
January 1st, 2007 at 1:56 pm
The next commenter better know what the reference before diving into commentaire en fran?ais.
January 1st, 2007 at 10:34 pm
sms-ing hurts
January 1st, 2007 at 10:35 pm
“I should?ve sent the message out, not received it.
It was Harish.
?? since the networks are going to be jammed? HAPPY NEW YEAR??
Damn.
Too slow.”
muhahahahahahahahahahahahaha
January 1st, 2007 at 11:08 pm
You know that feeling?
When you’re in a room… everyone is relaxed… an office party, for example… you look around at everyone there… you listen to what they’re saying… discussing the passed day…
When all of a sudden, you get the perfect joke… Absolute stunner of a line… and suddenly, as soon as it reaches your mind, you see your window…
‘Well,’ you think, ‘if they laughed on old jokes by the cubicle, this will have them on the floor…’
And in the microsecond that passes during all this, your mouth begins to form the words.
Ah, the perfect delivery you think…
Except that everyone stares at you… in that very, very odd way.
As if you’re wearing the wrong kind of translucent pink shirt over a fluorescent lamp.
Their mouths are open. Eyes blinking rarely.
No sound.
Then, one, solitary cough.
——————————————————-
Guess how I feel, buckos.
January 2nd, 2007 at 10:18 am
I hate noir. And I’ve explained the joke to Sud. and the one, solitary cough is an oft repeated theme…far too fictional to be regarded as an incident or even a analogy.
January 2nd, 2007 at 10:39 am
Fuhgget it.
Anyone shouldn’t even bother commenting on this post anymore.
December 31st, 2008 at 6:08 pm
[...] this link from the past as [...]
January 2nd, 2009 at 12:09 pm
A year on – and maybe a few years on .. this one will still be good ..